okay, so it's not monday. it's a wednesday. but whenever you come back from vacation, it's going to feel like a monday.
well it's finally here, spring break is over and spring quarter has begun.
today, i had two classes, and i have one more tomorrow. now that classes are over for today, i'm beginning to realize that break really truly is over, and i have things to do. homework specifically, in case you were wondering.
for some reason, i'm feeling kind of depressed. i can't exactly pinpoint it; although i'm sure it has to do with getting dropped from the vacation high i was on, as well as the weather outside. washington apparently hasn't gotten the memo that it is SPRING and the SUN should be out now. but this is the northwest right?
i'm also fasting today until 7:30 pm -- every wednesday leading up to easter, some of the girls and i on my floor take each wednesday as an opportunity to not eat and use whatever comfort we might find in food to find in jesus. it's hard to not just open my cabinet and eat some cheez-its, but this is teaching me a lesson in faith. and thankfulness.
another thing that has been bothering me is that i feel like i'm in a rut. this is college, i'm supposed to be getting out, trying new things, meeting new people. and i definitely have been. but the thing with the meeting new people is that after the first week of school, it becomes a little difficult. people already have their circles of friends, and it's hard to break any mold. i am a great example of this, i feel like once i have my group, i don't need anyone else, which is far from the truth. i feel like i don't know as many people as i should. i suppose i'm used to high school, where i knew everyone and felt comfortable walking into somewhere alone and finding someone to talk to. the thing i often forget is that was 4-5 years of friendships. i've only been in college for 6 months. the difference is colossal. i also feel like i don't have many solid guy friends here. that is partly to blame on the 3:1 ratio (ok, a majority to blame) but i'm also not the kind of girl who is super outgoing and chases down the boys. i just am not. and probably never will be. all in due time, right?
while i'm at it, i also don't know what to do with my life. i'm not really great at picking out what i'm good at, because i'm good at different things. but i know what i don't want to do. i don't want to be a doctor, nurse, teacher, lawyer, or anything that involves science. which is unfortunate, because most of those jobs have a good salary/job availability. but i would rather do something i love even if the salary isn't great. and from talking to my brother who is an accountant, i believe this more than ever. i just want a degree that i'm actually going to use in my career. this might be unrealistic thinking, i realize that.
i'm really excited for my major & career exploration class that starts tomorrow, i'm hoping it will give me a direction. or an answer. or something. we shall see.
i think that's enough venting for now.
the truth is, my problems pale in comparison to what's happening in the rest of the world.
i am lucky. and blessed.
l o v e
It's honest and that's a start! You might not find a career that exactly matches your major, but doing something you love is key. You could always get a degree in family and consumer science with minor in business and open a bakery
ReplyDelete:) I say that because I ate a TON of your treats two nights ago and they are delish!
Agree with Chelsea; you might be able to make a living off of feeding just us! You may want to look into that UW Young Life group if it's still going...could expand your circle of friends. Remember I had the same thoughts about my major which is why I put off naming it until my second semester of my sophomore year! Love you!
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