reflections.

as i pause today to reflect on Easter and Christ's rising from the grave, i am continually reminded of how undeserving i am of such a holy and sovereign savior. but that's the beauty of grace, it is a gift. even though we don't deserve it, we are redeemed by a love everlasting.


also; as i come up on the last 6 weeks of my freshman year of college [seriously, where has the time gone?!] i reflect on....


what was my life like one year ago?
ok, so even though i'm not half-way across the country, engaged (ring by spring anyone??), didn't get any crazy piercings or tattoos, and haven't gained 30 pounds, i am in some ways completely changed. on the inside though ;)
exactly one year ago i was pulling my hair out trying to figure out where to go to college. i had three choices, and just could not for the life of me make a decision. not that that's anything new; but this was a decision that was of extreme importance. where was i going to go for the next 4 years of my life? i applied to three schools and consequently got into three schools. throughout the application process, i half-way hoped that one or more of them would reject me, thus making a decision for me. but that's not what God had in store for me. i will spare you most of the details, but basically i had it down to point loma, westmont college, and seattle pacific. for a long while, i was convinced that i was going to school in california. i had made my mind up. spu was really just for fun, kind of on the back burner. i visited all three schools and weighed my options, the pros and cons (over and over and over). one year ago, my parents made me decide before it was too late [may 1st deadline]. i shockingly decided on spu.
so there it was, concrete. on paper. i was going to attend seattle pacific university in the fall of 2010. and you know what? i couldn't be happier with my decision. no matter where i would have gone, i'm sure i would have found great things about it, but i'm glad i chose to go here. if i didn't end up loving it, then i would change. college is supposed to be the time of your life, and you should be happy with where you're at. it's okay to make a change. it's also okay to realize that you aren't perfect and never will be. sure, there have been several bumps on the road, lots of tears and frustrations, but just as many laughs and great times. i have made friends i know i will have for life. i've acquired 20 sisters that i can always count on. i can't begin to tell you the things i have learned both in and out of the classroom at college. during orientation and the first week of school, you're basically thrown into the deep end and you just have to learn how to swim to survive. without challenges and hard times, there is no growth. i can safely say i've grown not only in maturity and responsibility, but in my faith as well. i've been learning how to make my faith my own. and it's exciting. one year ago, i had different friends. not that i'm not still friends with most of them, i just have met so many new friends. and i'm not sad about it.


so what's in store for the next year?
who really knows? i could be engaged for all i know. (hahaha, kidding. you can breathe now, parents) although i can't predict the future, i do have some goals i would like to achieve. they are as follows: decide on my major and be satisfied with it, grow in my faith even more, and find a job (hopefully!)


all i know is that i'm taking life one quarter at a time, one week at a time, and one day at a time. and while i deal with doubt and uncertainties at times, i've learned that God is in control and his perfect will for my life is better than anything i could ever imagine.